I'm uncomfortable

I'm uncomfortable in most areas of my life right now. In the waves of grief and confusion that seem to be driving me into a hole, I welcome the brief halos of light that seem to appear after very dark moments. I was in this dark moment yesterday, one of my darkest days in recent memory. In the midst of this pain...I had a thought.

If I am to actually transform, oppose to just "get through" this dark stretch I seem to be stuck in. Maybe I need to stop trying to be uncomfortable. Maybe instead of looking for a way out of my darkness I need to embrace where I am. Maybe this is the practice.

In my year of travel, mostly solo, I had moments even days of uncomfortableness....and instead of hiding, grieving, wilting...I faced it head on. I didn't plan how I was going to reconcile this uncomfortableness, I just accepted it as part of the process. And I did change, on some very deep levels. I am a very different person now than I was before. 

So instead of fighting my pain, I'm just going to start wading into it and see what I find in there.

 "Let go or be dragged" Zen Proverb